Hi friend,
Happy February… March! :) Keeping with the theme I wrote about in January on moving a bit slowly into the new year, February required me to set this newsletter down to tend to other priorities. And so, as I look to a fresh month, I’m taking a deep breath with hope for some rest, play, and turning toward tasks that needed to be set aside.
I hope you’re also able to take a deep breath with me and that your month is off to a peaceful start.
Today, not only am I celebrating Women’s History Month with tender gratitude for the women who have empowered and supported me and so many others along the way, but I’m also celebrating a sweet milestone for The Soul of the Helper —
This little book has officially been out in the world for TWO years!! 🥹 I am still so grateful for the gift to have gotten to bring her into being, and so humbled by the ways y’all have shared how this book has helped and supported you in all the ways you serve others. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
What a gift to have these stages and chapters, the research, and my own little story making its way into your hands (or audiobook listeners’ ears!) over the last couple of years. Thank you for purchasing a copy, sharing it with others, leaving reviews, elevating quotes/takeaways on social media, using it in your classes or with clients, and more. It’s all a gift.
Celebrating with 40% off + FREE shipping!!
To celebrate, you can pick up a copy at 40% OFF(!) right now from the publisher’s website!! Just use the code: PRESS40OFF at checkout and — bonus — you’ll get free shipping, too!! Get one for you and send one to an out-of-town friend as a surprise gift with free shipping!
Regardless if you check out the book or audiobook (on sale for $10 here), I do sincerely hope the chapters serve you well. 🤲
I’ve learned over the years with co-hosting CXMH podcast that authors may, in hindsight, find that they have different views now than they did while writing the book. That may be my experience one day, but for now at two years out, this book and these chapters continue to minister to me as I catch myself unintentionally moving too quickly, taking on too much, or saying yes to too many people. I’m humbly reminded again and again of the importance of the practices and rhythms embedded within these chapters to slow down, practice stillness, and see our inherent worth as we go out and serve others.
May they minister to you, too, in all the ways you are serving others, dear one.
Connecting with my high school self
As another gift within today, I had the opportunity this morning to speak to four groups of high school students for their career day. And this wasn’t just any high school — it was the all-girls school I graduated from in NY over 20 years ago.
The high school that held my daily rhythms, spaces, and friendships that kept me afloat during some of the most difficult years of my life. The one where I’d spend hours tucked away in the ceramics room listening to Coldplay, Dave Matthews Band, or Norah Jones shaping + painting clay as I was being shaped by something beyond me. The one where I’d find rest in the nurse’s or counselor’s office, connection with friends in the cafeteria, or discover an unexpected love for reading/writing in Mrs. White’s English class… (who would be thrilled to know I still have my senior portfolio.)
So I paused before and after my time with these students to go back to my younger self and imagine giving her a big squeeze, because talking with these incredible young women who walk the halls I once did and empowering them to do what they were created to do felt like a *major* full-circle moment… let alone on this book’s 2nd birthday… or 2 weeks out from learning I would be promoted to full professor in August… or at the start of social work month… or women’s history month.
I’m so glad that younger version of myself made it to this moment.
I’m so grateful she’s here, and for her grittiness, perseverance, and passion.
I’m so thankful for her heart to serve — a quiet constant in the midst of years of bumpiness and brokenness.
And I’m so very happy that she knows she is loved.
Finally, a little love note about my mom as we begin Women’s History Month…
I mentioned my mom a bit in the January newsletter, and I have so many more things I could say about her… But what I most want you to hear is this: I would not be who I am today without her grounded presence and gentle authenticity. She taught me love, grit, kindness, patience, sacrifice, how to have a big faith, the value of good music (she took me to my first DMB concert in the late 90s), the beauty of a nurtured garden, the gift of a cozy + clean home, and how to snuggle up at the end of a long day and just be.
She has been a steady presence in my life and I am so grateful for the years and memories I hold of when it was just the two of us. The layers of that story aren’t for this space, but I am eternally grateful for her love + support, for her patience + hope, for her encouragement + empowerment, and for the gift of getting to be her daughter.
She is so much of why I am who I am today. She empowered me to really take the time to consider what I wanted to do and to connect it with a why that’s rooted in love. I wrote about the soft, safe place she offered me to heal from the pain I had navigated as a kid. But flipping through my yearbook this morning, I was struck rereading what she wrote to me over 20 years ago and the ways she still embodies this spirit of love.
May we continually seek to empower the girls and women around us, friends.
And for the women reading this, may we empower the younger versions of ourselves.
May we speak words of love, truth, goodness, and encouragement over the girls around (and within) us.
May we make a way for other women to flourish — to find their flow and what they were created to do, and to do go do that(those) thing(s) with their whole heart.
(ps. I love you with all my heart, too, Mom. ~xo 💛)
Spirituality + Mental Health
Each month, you’ll find miscellaneous resources here on the intersection of spirituality + mental health that I’ve recently been reminded of or come across! Most are general resources, but I’ll add some research-focused ones every now and then.
2024 World Congress on Moral Injury, Spirituality, and Healing (March 11-13)
Hosted by Harvard University’s Human Flourishing Program; summary from website: “The World Congress on Moral Injury, Spirituality, and Healing is bringing together thought leaders from across the globe in a dynamic on-line format to share research and insights on institutional and systemic drivers of moral distress, and moral injury, and highlights evidence-informed strategies for prevention, and healing those who are suffering from this tragic human condition.”
The Ethical Integration of Faith and Spirituality Into Practice Workshop
(March 20; University of Mary Hardin-Baylor; Belton, TX — in-person event)
From the website: In the demanding field of helping professions, spirituality often takes a backseat to the urgent needs of our clients. Dr. Holly Oxhandler, renowned researcher and author of "Soul of the Helper: Seven Stages to Seeing the Sacred Within Yourself So You Can See It in Others," challenges this paradigm in this transformative ethics workshop. This FREE workshop challenges conventional boundaries by examining the ethical imperative of acknowledging and incorporating faith and spirituality within the helping professions. Dr. Oxhandler draws from her own research, fostering a dialogue that explores the sacred aspects of self and others.
New Research!! 🥳
Promoting religious and spiritual competencies in clinical social work: Considerations, potential barriers, and supports (Oxhandler, Canda, Polson, Husain, & Parrish)
Note: I LOVED writing this paper with some beloved mentors and colleagues. Grateful for the invitation we were given to write it and I hope it helps clinical social workers (and related professionals). The abstract is available via the link above. If you’re interested in accessing it or any other papers of mine, please visit my ResearchGate page.
Podcasts
CXMH
CXMH is a podcast on faith and mental health that I cohost alongside my friend, Robert Vore. Be sure to subscribe, leave a review, follow on social media (@cxmhpodcast), and share episodes with others!
178 - Starting the Year Slowly
A Couple of Books for Your Journey
The Soul of the Helper: Seven Stages to Seeing the Sacred Within Yourself So You Can See It in Others
*Elevating this at the top to celebrate its 2nd birthday! And this link is where you can get 40% off + free shipping by using the code PRESS40OFF. 🙌
Leaving Church: A Memoir of Faith by Barbara Brown Taylor
*I’ve finally finished this, and yes, it was so good that I wanted to elevate it again this month. My soul needed BBT’s words way more than I realized. That last chapter — whew.
To Hell with the Hustle: Reclaiming Your Life in an Overworked, Overspent, and Overconnected World by Jefferson Bethke
The Mind-Body Cure: Heal Your Pain, Anxiety, and Fatigue by Controlling Chronic Stress by Dr. Bal Pawa
Want MORE book recommendations? Check out my bookshop page!
(I get a tiny portion of purchases made through that link, but feel free to buy the book wherever you prefer. I mostly prefer the layout for recommending books to others!)
What I’m Listening To These Days
I’ve shifted from my jazz playlists (Jazz Chill + Fall Jazz) a bit over to the Piano Chill + Pure Focus playlists. Something about us moving out of the 12 darkest weeks of the year (which ended on February 1st — 6 weeks after winter solstice) and into some warmer, slightly sunnier days has me shuffling from cozy jazz to these piano/focus playlists that reminds me spring is coming...
Taylor Swift. A lot. One little Oxhandler prefers 1989, another prefers reputation, and evermore was the album that finally turned me into a fan.
I’m also returning to some mid-1990s tunes to honor what’s been surfacing since my trip to NY in January. Here are a handful that I’ve been singing along to lately (you’re welcome 😉) …
And then there’s Tracy Chapman and Luke Combs’ Grammy performance of Fast Car that brought tears to my eyes… if you haven’t watched it, please, please do.
Benediction
As we step into this 3rd month of 2024 and whatever it will bring, simultaneously mindful of whatever January and February held…
May we find moments to pause, rest, take note of our journey, and excavate the lessons that can only be seen with some time and distance.
May we seek to embody Howard Thurman’s wisdom: “Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.”
May we honor the gift it is to get to love + serve within each day we’re given, remembering to take gentle care of ourselves, too.
And circling back to some of what I wrote earlier and in honor of it being Women’s History Month:
For the women reading this, may we empower the younger versions of ourselves.
May we speak words of love, truth, goodness, and encouragement over the girls around (and within) us.
May we make a way for other women to flourish — to find their flow and what they were created to do, and to do go do that(those) thing(s) with their whole heart.
Be well, friends. Breathe deep and remember how truly loved you are as you are in this moment.
Kindly,
Holly
website | book | podcast
follow along on: instagram | twitter | facebook